San Diego city officials have mobilized park rangers to remove free yoga classes from parks and beaches. The move was made following an update to city code, which has designated the areas as protected hobo camping zones.
The classes have been a long-running eyesore in the community. On many mornings, park areas were over-run with taxpaying, Lululemon-clad, outdoor fitness enthusiasts, leaving little to no room for dirty drunken hobos to park their shopping carts and sprawl on sleeping bags surrounded by trash.
The crackdown arrives as the finishing touch on San Diego’s new tough-on-crime approach. With the removal of the outdoor classes, San Diego is now virtually 100% crime free, and there are no remaining pressing issues for city policy makers to address.
“I understand some people find this policy unfair, but in our perfect, crime-free city, we need to nip this fitness craze in the bud,” opined city board member Lorena McBobbitt. “The last thing we want is for this to turn into San Francisco or something where entire neighborhoods have become unwalkable due to all the street yoga.”
McBobbitt pointed out that the new code enforcement is intended to keep the city beautiful and accessible to all, and to discourage a rise in criminal activities that often naturally accompany open displays of entrepreneurship or fitness.
