Satire

MLS Mulls Official Fan Cage Fights: “Winner Gets Free Tacos and Bail Money”
In a bold move to embrace what fans call the “true SoCal derby spirit,” Major League Soccer reportedly floated a new initiative: official ...

San Diego To Solve Budget Crisis By Selling Naming Rights to Each Pothole
Facing a $31 million budget hole and rapidly dwindling reserves, the City of San Diego announced this week an innovative plan to sell ...

New Monopoly Game Features $1 Million Starter Loans For Accurate California Experience
Hasbro is bringing board games into the brutal reality of the California housing market with their latest release, Monopoly: California Dreamin’ Edition. Gone ...

Ocean Beach Unfazed by Public Bathroom Closures—Locals Prefer Sidewalks Anyway
San Diego, CA — As the City of San Diego prepares to close public restrooms at beaches for the winter, officials expected waves ...

Swingin’ Friar Rumored Frontrunner for Next Pope
SAN DIEGO, CA — Following Pope Francis’ passing on April 21st, the Catholic Church is looking to hit a real home run selecting ...

San Diego to Impose Tariffs on Dodgers Fans
SAN DIEGO, CA — In a bold move hailed by sports fans and embittered bartenders alike, the City of San Diego has announced ...

CA Bans Parking Within a Quarter Mile of Wherever You’re Going
SAN DIEGO, CA — Beginning in 2025, new legislation takes effect, prohibiting Californians from parking within one quarter of a mile from anywhere ...

Prop 36 Passes, Making Repeat Theft a Felony – California Thieves Consider Moving to Oregon
California, USA — With the passage of Proposition 36, California voters have sent a clear message to habitual shoplifters, petty thieves, and professional ...

Tijuana River Pollution Crisis Sparks New San Diego Spa Trend: ‘Toxic Mud Baths’
San Diego – As the Tijuana River’s pollution problem worsens, local officials have found a creative way to turn disaster into a health ...

San Diegans Declare San Diego the Worst City in California, Encourage Everyone to Move to LA Instead
In a groundbreaking new survey conducted by absolutely no one official, San Diegans have unanimously declared their beloved coastal city to be the ...